Maybe you should try acting like an adult.

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other.  Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.  ~Katharine Hepburn

Blessings and more Blessings

The Palest African American

Yesterday I had the lovely honor of being invited to a new friend's family dinner. Now, my family gatherings are small. There are usually about eight of us. I go to this family dinner and there are twenty-two people + four friends + two very large women and a small child who may have actually been a dog. And everyone is laughing and yelling and joking the whole time. I ate more food than I care to admit and was, at times, overwhelmed. I'd compare it to a very safe rave, minus the glowsticks. I played Catchphrase and laughed. It was a good experience.


In three days I get to go home. I am very excited because I miss my family and my friends. I have a large group of friends back home. We mostly bitch and complain about each other, but deep down we love our little group. Way, way deep down. I'm so happy because friends that have also moved away will be back in town and I plan on seeing all their faces and hugging them for a very long time (so long it may seem awkward). I love the holidays. I love wearing holiday-appropriate makeup and Christmas music (Nat King Cole is essential) and cussing out drivers near the mall. I love everything about it. 

It's true.

This music video made me tear up. I don't know what's wrong with me.

Quotable Quotes

Some of your hurts you have cured,
And the sharpest you still have survived,
But what torments of grief you endured
From the evil which never arrived.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Cranberry Sauce Should Never Come from a Can.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving here in the States. It's a holiday commonly associated with turkeys and overeating. It's suppose to be a day of counting your blessings, but with the rise of consumerism, sometimes that message gets lost in all the advertisements for Black Friday (google it).


I love Thanksgiving because I see my family. It's cheesy, but I love it. Every Thanksgiving is essentially the same. We load up the car and haul over to my cousin's house. Her mom makes a salad while my uncle critiques the cooking process from the living room couch, beer in hand. My dad slaves over the oven for hours and only answers direct questions related to food or football. My hormonal teenage cousin ignores all of us and texts on her cellphone. I socialize with everyone and create a plan on how to avoid eating too much (plan fails every year). My sister can be found eyeing the clock every five minutes, counting down the time till we leave. My mother flits around the house documenting each moment with her camera and forces anyone breathing to smile and "ACT HAPPY!". My older cousin will not make an appearance till she  has her makeup on and has been warned that the food is hitting the table in 5 minutes whether she's wearing mascara or not. We sit and eat and talk. Later we fight over leftovers since both my twiggy cousins can out-eat grown men. And that is why I love this Holiday. It's not glamorous or chic or exciting, it's just my family. 

The Body is Not a Cold Dead Place

 Sometimes when I get stressed or just need a second to myself, I close my eyes and go to the blue room. It's this silly coping exercise I learned when I was younger, but sometimes it still makes me feel good when I'm having a moment. I close my eyes. My happy place is a little room that has one window that overlooks a European city. I'm not sure where, but the street below that window is cobblestone and little houses run up and down the street. People walk along the pavement and a boy on a bicycle passes. The walls in my room are jazz blue and there's bookshelves along the left and right walls. There's also a beat up couch and a desk that I sit at. The room's door is across from the door that leads to the kitchen. Our kitchen has black and white tile and there is always a dark haired man making me a cup of coffee in there. I watch the city below and eventually a dark haired toddler comes and sits on my lap. We watch the city together and I point out interesting things. It peaces me out, this totally made up scenario. Maybe one day it will be true.